and this is why I am easily not anyone's friend of choice

severe elev. | high elev. | moderate elev. | slight elev. | BASELINE | slight dep. | moderate dep. | deep dep. | severe dep. || anx: 1, agit: 1


Q : What do you do when the people around you keep spouting idiotic things?
A : Ignore them and hope they stop talking. If that doesn't work and if you feel like being a jerk, challenge them to defend their position. Show off your own intelligence to silence them. Speak in straight English to intimidate.


I can justify that i simply crave some intellectual stimulation (well, it is true). And no one dares engage me.

If I should avoid triggers during an episode, i really should stay away from people who think they're so smart but keep saying un-smart things. Pet Peeve # 72. I don't mind talking with people with lower IQ, just as long as they aren't arrogantly trying to project that they're smarter than they actually are.

Lately I've been exposed to a lot of them. Particularly a few "sightly older people" who assume that just because I am younger I am necessarily naive and inexperienced, and that it is therefore their God-given duty to give me their unsolicited advice. I can't really say that they care; I really feel like they're just meddling.

In one recent meeting with said kind of people, I really thought i was being polite, but when I got home I had a more sober recollection of the evening. That's how it usually goes: Bipolar thinks she is doing OK, bipolar exhibits dreadful behavior, bipolar later regrets show of dreadful behavior. Anyway, I had a feeling they invited us for dinner just to push their own agenda, under the guise of extending their appreciation. Tough luck for them that I'm currently in dysphoria - anx 1, agit 2. I think I slightly snapped at this older man and later showed a lack of grace, just enough to make things go silent at their dinner table. I suppose i may have offended their lack of intelligence. Yeah, yeah; that might have been crass of me, but i hope that teaches them not to meddle in things that really aren't their business. If they weren't so nice, I would have told them off for their ignorant assumptions and their artless snooping.

Of course i'm also considering the possibility that my paranoia is getting the best of me.

And this is why I am easily not anyone's friend of choice, and I really don't mind, because I wouldn't want to be friends with an imbecile who thinks he's an intellectual.