King David

today's weather: S L I G H T D E P R E S S I O N
anxiety : 2
agitation : 3

I sat in church today and listened to another preaching on Samuel 17, i.e., David and Goliath - a Christian culture favorite . There wasn't any "new spin" to this particular preaching (it didn't really have to; it's usual points are timeless), but I was able to add a bit of a twist as I listened and meditated about it in my seat.

Image from here.

In my searches for lists of famous bipolars in the past, I've noticed that some of them included King David.  

King David was Bipolar.   I initially thought of this theory as a forced attempt to name a figure from ancient history. There isn't be any solid evidence to prove it, but there certainly isn't anything to disprove it either. As a matter of fact, the accounts of the life of David and the songs / psalms that he wrote are huge evidence that Israel's favorite king was prone to inexplicable, extreme mood swings.  It's also quite easy to spot his symptoms. 

For example, as I read through the passage in which the young, pre-kingship, shepherd boy David confronted the big, mean Philistine, I imagined it would've sounded like someone in an elevation would say:

⁴⁶"Today the Lord will conquer you, and I will kill you and cut off your head. And then I will give the dead bodies of your men to the birds and wild animals, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel! ⁴⁷ And everyone assembled here will know that the Lord rescues his people, but not with sword and spear. This is the Lord’s battle, and he will give you to us!”
1 Samuel 17: 45-47, NLT

To those who are familiar with the passage, it would probably look like the same old same old, i.e., those are naturally the words of someone full of faith in God, which our favorite Old Testament character David was, big duh. And that is precisely my point: he was someone busting at the seams with faith.

But think about it. David was just a teenager here. He wasn't merely brave in this incident, he was brazen. Almost to the point of crazy - in fact everyone else thought he was ridiculous. David's belief and behavior were far from "normal" .

Anyway. The preacher paused to ask the congregation, "Do you think he was scared?," He went on to explain that nowhere in the text did it say David was scared, but if he was a normal human boy, you could assume that he was. I nodded to agree, but then I changed my mind.

 If David was normal. But he was not - at least not at the psychological level. If David felt scared, I kinda think Samuel would have included that in the text, since he was already careful to write how everyone else was already shaking in their armor, and he never failed to indicate David's other character flaws. But I suppose Samuel didn't write about David's fear simply because there was none.  David's fearlessness and faith were after all the notable themes in this story (and everyone else's fear provided a convenient counterpoint). I think it's perfectly safe to assume David didn't feel scared.

If David really was bipolar in a manic episode, it's very possible he felt no fear. None at all. Zero. If ever he did, it would be negligible. He would have been fearless to the point of idiotic careless. His faith would have skyrocketed to unbelievable degrees, and it would have been easy for him to talk down to Goliath as if the ogre-esque champion was a dog with its tail between its legs. I can imagine that, because I know how that feels.

David was very likely a mood-swingy, tortured bipolar:

• He didn't display that brazen fearlessness (as in the Goliath story) all the time; there were times that he feared for his life and hid. How come, right?
  Of course even "normal" people have times of high faith and low.  But think about the circumstances.  "Normal" people''s faith would be high when things are doing great.  Shepherd David had no reason to be high about, but he still was.
• The guy did have severe mood swings. Come on, he could cycle several times in a single Psalm. 
  Sure, "normal" people have their ups and downs too, but not wild like this.
• His bravery in the Goliath incident was, according to himself, tried and tested by his years as a shepherd, particularly by encounters with lions and bears. The kid fought poorly armed against savage animals to save his father's sheep. I mean, who does that? It's apparent he had intense focus and tremendous physical energy, such as that come with an elevation.
• When he wept, he really wept.  Often times to the point of despair and suicidal thoughts.
• When he rejoiced, he really rejoiced.
• He was emotionally and spiritually sensitive.
• He was intelligent and multi-talented.
• As Godly as he was, he was no stranger to self-centered rumination.
• He had bouts of uncharacteristic behavior.

This makes me laugh with glee - David was bipolar! And that inspires me a lot.