today's weather: S L I G H T . E L E V A T I O Nanxiety : 1
agitation : 1
DISCLAIMER: I am not a professional. I claim no authority on the subject and speak only for myself. I strongly advise against basing your life decisions on my opinions. You have a brain, use it.
It was about this time last year that I had a surgery to have my impacted tooth removed. It was also about this time last year that I had to discontinue taking the Lithium since it interacts negatively with most pain relievers, and I could not submit myself to surgery without any sort of pain reliever. I hadn't taken Lithium since, and I'm feeling better than ever.
I imagine this will draw the disapproval of
I know that meds are supposed to be good, they are supposed to be helpful, but medical professionals never tell you about the negative side effects. Two years of taking Lithium has actually been more harmful to me than helpful, and I have no plans of taking it again unless it is absolutely necessary (i.e., when my stress levels threaten to spin out of control- but that can easily be avoided).
Here are the "benefits" that Lithium gave me:
- It actually did nothing for the mood swings. All it did was just dull my fervor a little, but the mood swings and emotions were still there. It was generally useless.
- It helped to quiet my mind somewhat, but it did not take away the anxiety and irritability.
- Because it muted my ability to perceive emotional pain a bit, it also muted my conscience. I felt no compulsion to repent of anything or forgive anyone. That's not good for a devoted Christian.
- It made it difficult to connect with God or hear from Him. It was not very enjoyable to worship or pray.
- It dulled my creativity. I happen to be an naturally artistic sort of individual; creativity is very important to me. With Lithium I had no artistic ability at all. I could not write poetry. My sketchbook rotted. I could not feel music the way I used to.
- It dulled my perceptions and my ability to form opinions. It slowed my thinking.
- It made me feel so far away from myself, like feeling trapped underwater.
- It gave me a stigma of one who is "medicated", thus made me feel far away from everyone else. That's not good at all.
- Lithium interacts with some 600 or so substances, including caffeine, calcium and all sorts of pain killers, so it put a lot of restrictions on me.
- It made me stupider. I used to have an eidetic memory and a very quick, sharp mind. The change was drastic, so I can't attribute it to "growing older". Though I'm still what most people would consider intelligent, I no longer have the same ability to retain large amounts of new information. I read it's a side effect of taking Lithium with NSAIDs, something the doctor never warned me about but said "It's okay". But no, it's not okay. It causes damage to cognitive functions, and I have reason to believe that's what happened.
- It made me less interested in amorous activities, and generally uninterested in sex. This is very harmful to a marriage.
- It made it so much easier to gain weight. Bummer.
- It gave me constant headaches, migraines and ringing in my ears. That's not much of a life.
I'm not willing to be a slave to all that all over again just for the sake of being "stable" (which is a big misnomer and misconception, by the way). Lithium does not produce desirable effects.
I used to think that bipolars who ditched their medication were wrong to do so, but now I get it.
I've said it before and I'll say it over and over again: good, loving an understanding relationships are vital, and in my opinion, more effective for me. I'm not a medical professional, so you are free not to take my word for it. I have also found that taking meds is counterproductive against bipolarity if there is no one around to give love and support.
And in my experience, coping activities + God + avoiding the triggers been more effective than Lithium in curbing elevation / depression. One year Lithium free, and I have never had an unmanageable problem since we adjusted our lifestyle.
